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Joke of the Day

"Staying at my daughter's place again this weekend. Can't wait till 3am so I can wake her to tell her there's a moth in my room."

"Reports of a man being shot with a starters pistol.. Police think it may be race related"

"WHY DOES THIS BOTTLE OF BODY WASH HAVE DIRECTIONS PRINTED ON IT"

"Made up a classy joke, give me your feedback... I broke up with my clone the other day. Being sincere, I told him ""its not you, its me""."

"If Trump wins Im leaving the country if Clinton wins Im leaving the country Not a political post, I just love to travel"

"What's red, bloody and hangs of the back of a train? Miscarriage."

"Hermione Granger: What can I wear that won't make me look fat? Ronald Weasley: An invisibility cloak"

"There's no point to a dull knife."

"Knock knock. Who's there? Baby Owl. Baby Owl who? Baby Owl see you later baby not."

"A limerick for Guildford in Surrey At McDonald's in Guildford in Surrey I spilt coffee on my crotch in a scurry I had to act quick To cool down my dick So I stuck it into my McFlurry"