6346

Joke of the Day

"Pancake in Spanish is panqueque, which translates back into English as *does raise the roof motion* bread whaaaat whaaaat"

"TIFU by climbing into a German U-Boat Whoops. Wrong sub."

"if you're stuck in a group text, an easy way out is to throw your phone in the street and start a new life"

"How did the Bohemian pay? Just a Check"

"Why do you call a Mexican midget a paragraph? Because he isn't a full essay"

"""Honey,can u make the dinner reservations for 3 instead of 2 tonight? Debby's coming"" ""We're not bring ur new chainsaw-"" ""HER NAME'S DEBBY"""

"My sister is holding her baby in one hand and a cup of Starbucks in the other, I'm going to toss her phone at her to see who gets dropped."

"If you found a five dollar bill in every pocket of your coat what would you have ? Someone else's coat."

"I replied ""maybe"" to your facebook event out of respect for the inherent uncertainty of life's journey."

"Why is it called PMS'ing? Mad cow disease was already taken."