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Joke of the Day

"How did the Bohemian pay? Just a Check"

"I think that this entire Jared thing will just end up resulting in a teeny jail sentence."

"My dolphin died... I have no porpoise in life."

"A guy walks into a bar with a duck on his head... the bartender said, ""Can I help you?"" and the duck said, ""Yeah, get this guy off my ass."""

"Bill Cosby is going to have a new show Women Say the Darndest Things"

"Did anyone else witness that jet crashing into the ocean? It was plane to sea."

"HUSBAND: When I get mad at you, you never fight back.How do you control your anger? WIFE : I clean the toilet.... HUSBAND:How does that help ? WIFE : I use your toothbrush."

"I played a blank CD full blast on repeat all night last night. The mime next door went nuts!"

"When the police officer asks how much have I had to drink tonight- 'all of it' wasn't as funny to him as it was to me."

"Stephen Hawking calculates the properties of the universe from a wheelchair and I'm googling how to get paid without leaving my house"