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Joke of the Day
"Jared Fogle got 15 years 8 months. But officer, she told me she was 18!"
Next Joke
"I swear to god I'm not harassing you, I'm really out of shape that's just my labored breathing"
"""I don't even own a slave"" - colonial hipster"
"Haters gonna hate, potaters gonna potate."
"If you could go back in time, would you kill Hitler or just watch movies that aren't about superheroes?"
"At the grocery store, my daughter held up two types of fabric softener... ...and she asked, ""Would you rather have dryer sheets, or dryer balls?"""
"My sister is gifting me some rain forest this Christmas... Is it possible to hire some local loggers or will I have to travel to Brazil and cut it down myself?"
"Hey girl with 20,000 tweets and 14 followers, I'm guessing you should probably shut the fuck up."
"How many Jews does it take to kill Jesus? You can't kill a myth."
"I once knew a girl called Virginia... We called her Virgin for short, but not for long!"