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Joke of the Day

"How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? They don't. They just arrest the entire room for being dark."

"In German, the imperative is formed by opening your mouth and speaking German."

"*explosiom of light* *univrse is created* *earth forms* *plants grow* *a grape fals off a vine adn drys* evreythimg hapens for a raisin"

"Which fish dresses the best? The Swordfish - It always looks sharp!"

"I bet George Washington's favorite drinking game had to have been Quarters."

"Good slumber party questions: - What's the furthest underground you've ever eaten a burger - How many necks have you touched - What's pesto"

"What's the best way to get to the mental hospital? Take the psychopath!!"

"Why hunt for vampires when you can just open a tuxedo shop and have them come to you? Work smarter, not harder."

"It's 'before' not 'B4'... We don't speak Bingo here..."

"Which two farm animals are the dirtiest? Brown chicken brown cow.."