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Joke of the Day

"A Texas sheriff found a black man who was shot 12 times. He said it was the worst case of suicide he'd ever seen."

"The Roomba vacuum cleaner just beat me to a piece of popcorn I dropped on the floor & this is how the war against the machines begins."

"I wanted to do some light history reading this summer... ...so I read the biography of Thomas Edison."

"How do you know that the drum riser is level? The drummer dribbles out of both corners of his mouth"

"So a skeleton walks into a bar and says ""I'll have a beer and a mop"""

"""Thanks, you've been a wonderful host!"" - Viruses"

"Smoked some weed the other night with some foreign dudes, massive language barrier... We got Rosetta Stoned."

"We're having a Jamaican hair day at work tomorrow I'm dreading it already."

"(Original) did you know that if you squeeze one of your balls hard enough you'll cum? Because sooner or later you'll bust a nut"

"I feel like putting on a shirt with a huge dot and going trick or treating the day after Halloween to scare people. Cause then I'd be a late period."