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Joke of the Day

"Politics informs every aspect of my life. It affects how much money I have, how I spend it, and my work itself. Sorry, not politics. Pokemon"

"It is estimated that 1 Million people plan to gather at Times Square to watch the ball drop while looking down at their phones."

"What's the difference between apathy and ignorance? I don't know and I don't care."

"What's the difference between Ozzy Osborne and Whitney Houston? One plays hard rock, the other is rock hard."

"What do you get if you cross a rhetorical question and a joke?"

"My ex-wife still misses me... ...BUT HER AIM IS GETTING BETTER!"

"I've come into a lot of money lately... It's a fetish I never knew I had until now."

"What did fish A say to fish B? Wasabi?"

"Its girls like u that cause global warming!"

"My life is like r/jokes It's the same thing everyday"