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Joke of the Day

"My friend Victor changed his last name to ""E"". No one knows why. He's become a Mystery."

"At last I've managed to find my girlfriend's G-spot! Who would have thought her sister had it all the time?"

"Y'know, I don't understand all the fuss about using 3D printers to make guns. I've had a Canon printer for years!"

"Sorry I stuck a cheese puff in your baby's mouth when you couldn't find a pacifier."

"My clothes don't fit anymore. There's only one possibly explanation. America is shrinking my clothes."

"How do you know when you're turning 40? When your candy jar is filled with Tums..... My wife just came up with that one... Birthday is next week.. Ugh"

"I masticate at least three times a day, usually at my computer Damn sticky keys!"

"A woman was masturbating furiously on the subway The police were going to arrest her, but she got off."

"How is pussy like veal? It tastes sweeter the younger it is."

"(nsfw) What do pimples and catholic priests have in common? They both start coming on boys' faces around age 13."