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Joke of the Day

"don't smoke pots because they are made of clay and can burn your tongue"

"Never play poker with a pieces of paper. They're bound to fold."

"I like my women like I like my coffee Hot and all over my pants."

"What would you get if you crossed a monster with a redcoat? A bigger target."

"An African, an Asian, and an Eskimo walk into a deez. Deez nuts."

"A policeman came into my house and told me to put my hands up.I told him that he wasn't a DJ and we laughed and laughed and now I'm in jail."

"How does an Alzheimer's patient celebrate New Years? Kissing strangers."

"Two newborns are having a conversation... 1: You look worried. What's wrong? 2: It's about my Dad. 1: What about him? 2: I saw him with Mom last night. I think he's stealing my milk."

"The fastest way to learn a foreign language is to take a lover who speaks that language, which makes me wonder about Mr. Ed."

"People say ""life's a journey, not a destination,"" because the destination is death. The journey sucks too. Anyway, to the bride and groom!"