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Joke of the Day

"Started to travel back in time to kill Hitler, but then I decided to be more efficient and went back and shot Adam and Eve instead."

"Why is the grass in Anfield Stadium so green? They are constantly putting millions of pounds of crap on it."

"What's the easiest way to annoy an anti-vaxxer? Needle them"

"My New Year's Resolution 1080p"

"What did the Pharaohs use to keep their babies quiet? Egyptian dummies."

"Some French words have silent t's, like ""ballet"" and ""tbonjour"""

"I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to Hell?"

"Cop: know y I pulled u over? Wife: to invite me to the state trooper's ball? Cop: state troopers don't have balls Me: BAHAHA Cop: drive safe"

"Why do all chicken coupes have two doors? Because if they had four doors they would be sedans."

"When I get on facebook I get excited when I see the red numbers over the globe thing until I open it and find it is for a stupid game request."