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Joke of the Day
"I just want someone to like me. Not you. I meant someone pretty."
Next Joke
"I think my doctor is trying to come on to me... He said I had a cute angina."
"How do you know if you sisters on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood."
"Taco Bell is serving breakfast now. Because why wait until afternoon when you can get diarrhea first thing in the morning!TM"
"caught my son running a google search for "" shit stain pussy "". i am beyond distraught. we are strictly a Bing family"
"What do you throw a drowning guitarist? His amp."
"Wearing contact lenses for the first time. My vision's gone from YouTube to Blu-Ray."
"My son failed gym. But he unlocked every achievement on Left 4 Dead so it's a wash."
"I dunno but if I was a ""doctor to the stars"" I sure wouldn't be bragging about it these days"
"PSA: If your kid bumps into me one more time with your shopping cart I will unhinge my jaw and swallow him whole."