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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a foot doctor, curled up in a ball on the floor? A pedal physician in the fetal position."

"*leaves the kids w/ a new babysitter *calls to check on the sitter"

"What did the police officer say to the white man running away with a TV? ""Sir, you dropped your receipt!"""

"What do you call a monk who walks everywhere in bare feet, has poor bone density and really bad breath? A super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis."

"Donald trump will be the best prime minister ever Jokes on you mods ! I already made a trump joke Damnit it's automatic. Seems like ""trump will do an excellent prime minister"" wasn't funn-ier"

"If I say ""Bloody Mary"" three times in the mirror in the dark I get a free drink, right?"

"What's the difference between Leonardo Dicaprio and Sesame Street? Sesame Street has an Oscar."

"What do Marylanders call their ex-girlfriends? Old Bay."

"What do you get when you put a bunch of roosters into a compactor? A cock block!"

"How do you make a plumber cry? You murder his family."