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Joke of the Day

"You know whats the problem with Proctologists.... They always butt in."

"What do you call a principal who gives good blow jobs? A headmaster."

"What do you call a hooker at Christmas? A frostitute"

"My blind friend complained I was putting things in his way... He'll get over it."

"Alphaterrorism Part of the alphabet has been destroyed in a terrorist attack. It's not yet known which letter had anything to do with the atrocity, but early reports suggest G had."

"What is the best Vitamin for friendship? B1. Because no one wants to be friends with a guy in a metabolic coma due to a thiamine deficiency."

"Can you see? I hate it when people ask what I will be doing in 5 years time? Sorry I just don't have 2020 vision"

"I heard some new music today and I can't be sure if I liked it or not. It was called Schrodinger Scat."

"Speaking of dogs... There's a dog with no hind legs, and bollocks made of steel. So, this dog is coming down the street. Do you know what is the name of the dog? . . . . Sparky!"

"What did the deaf, blind dumb kid get for Christmas? Cancer."