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Joke of the Day
"That little dance your thumbs do when you don't know how to reply to someones text."
Next Joke
"Why do women live on average two years longer? Because the time they spend parking doesn't count."
"what do you get when you cross an octopus with a human? thrown in jail for public indecency and banned from the aquarium for life."
"What's the difference between a secret Taliban hideout and an Afghan public school? I don't know, I just fly the drone"
"If the Trader Joe's cashier doesn't say ""I love these"" about anything you're buying, you have to put it all back and start over. #sorrybro"
"What do a woman's anus and a 9 volt battery have in common? (NSFW) You know its against your better judgement, but you put your tongue on it anyway."
"What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet."
"How cute does one have to be to make sparks fly? Electro cute"
"What do you call a docks nanny? An Au'Peir"
"I took the shell off my racing snail to speed it up. If anything it made it more sluggish."