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Joke of the Day

"I told Leonardo DiCaprio a joke about the Oscars... He didn't get it."

"I go in hard, I come in soft, you blow me. What am I? Gum."

"Dating a homeless girl I can just drop her off anywhere after the date right?"

"It's been about 3 years since my last drink and I'm still hungover."

"Why does a barber never shave a man with a wooden leg? Because he always uses a razor."

"A book fell on my head... I can only blame my shelf."

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a lentil? No one's going to pay to have a lentil on their face!"

"Seven days without a joke makes one weak."

"Dark humor is like food Some people just don't get it"

"What did one muffin say to the other? muffin', he wasn't a very talkative guy"