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Joke of the Day

"How many Redditors does it take to tell a joke? Two. One to post it and another to create a better punchline in the comments."

Next Joke
 
"I always wear a helmet during intercourse cause I'm a firm believer in safe sex. Doesn't help much against the STD's but it sure is effective against the pepper-spray."
"Got any spare change? No, Im an athiest. Can you give me a hand? No, Im an athiest. Hows the weather? Sorry, Im an athiest. - Athiests"
"Did you hear about...? The dad who put gasoline in his daughter's sippy cup? Doctor's say she's going to be fine. She just had a little gas."
"There are two types of people in this world Those who can extrapolate information based off of the given context"
"Norwegian Robot If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it... Scandinavian"
"What do sex and air have in common? They're no big deal unless you aren't getting any."
"Joe: If you love it so much why don't you marry it? Jim: Hmm [Two weeks later] Jim: Meet my new wife! *holds up Joe's wife's potato salad*"
"What do you call a grocery store for people with dementia? Question Mart."
"A girl has taking home a very handsome guy... ... to spend the night. When he unzips she bursts out: - ""Oh! I've never been with a circumcised guy before"" - ""I'm not. This is just wear n' tear"""