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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes the most spiritual thing you can do is go to bed."

"Sorry I threw firewood at you and yelled ""shoo"", but with the amount of eye liner you wear, you resemble the raccoons that raided my cooler."

"i love summer so much *sits around doing nothing*"

"I hate it when I pee in my pants and people think its just water that splashed on my crotch from washing my hands."

"It's sad how Wile E. Coyote is remembered for his violence, and not for his brilliantly realistic paintings of tunnels."

"Your refrigerators running. Hmmm let me check. My refrigerator is in fact not running. Thanks you kind young anonymous caller. You have saved me from a great deal of spoilage."

"What's the difference between Whose Line is it Anway and /r/jokes? On Whose Line is it Anyway, *everything* is made up."

"Me: ""I'd like to withdraw 3 sausages and a packet of peanuts please."" Man: ""That isn't how a food bank works, sir."""

"I have a recurring dream where I divide 10 by 3."

"I read an interesting stat online the other day.... Apparently 1 in two and a half men are HIV positive."