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Joke of the Day

"Three rifles walk into a bar... ... and one of them was assault."

"""This is mine"", he growled passionately into her ear. ""Are we clear?"" Breathlessly, she agreed. She wouldn't try to eat his nachos again."

"The American Presidential Campaign is a lot like the new Mac. **There is no escape.**"

"What do you call a penis with bad logic? A phallusy."

"COW: I'm constipated DR DOG: when was ur last bowel moooo-vement lol C: ur doing puns right now? DD: gonna milk this for all its worth lmao"

"During wartime, the Philippine flag is flipped upside down so the red part is on top The same thing is done with the French flag, but instead they remove the red and blue colors"

"I have developed an intolerance to gluten- -free people"

"Cheesy joke A muenster attacked Emmenthal institution. Everyone cheddared with panic. There was de brie everywhere. It was no Gouda."

"I Couldn't believe my dad got fired from his roadworks job... For stealing, but when I got home all the signs where there!"

"Rumours of a food shortage..... Rumours of a food shortage at this year's Spoonerism Awards turned out to be a complete lack of pies."