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Joke of the Day

"Knock! Knock!"

"What do we want? A cure for short-term memory loss! When do we want it? When do we want what?"

"There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down her sneered at me and I thought, well that's a little condescending."

"How many tweekers does it take to change a light bulb? Depends on which method you try...."

"""I move that we eliminate paper money altogether and use only coins!"" - a stack of change purses disguised as a US Senator"

"Don't make ebola jokes Some people just won't get it."

"Why did Bernie Sanders's chicken restaurant throw out so much food? He only sold left wings."

"Have you heard about the constipated math teacher? He worked the problem out with a pencil. On a sheet of paper."

"Are you a magician?? Because you're making my penis levitate."

"What does it take for a soldier in uniform to pick up a girl?... ....a smile and wave!"