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Joke of the Day

"""If you don't let the Jews go, I will find you. I will kill you."" Liam Neeson returns in... TAKEN 3: SCHINDLER'S PISSED (Summer 2015)"

"A guy knocked on my door asking for a donation to the local swimming pool. So I gave him a cup of water."

"I really enjoy my morning expresso... ... it's always esploding with flavour."

"What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph. He's too short to be an ese"

"Two trucks carrying thesauruses got in a wreck... Onlookers were aghast, amazed, appalled, astonished, astounded, dismayed, offended, shocked, stunned, upset..."

"The location of a pimple on your body is directly correlated to how much your body hates you."

"Paid a homeless guy $1 for this: What's a pirate's favorite letter? (They will always say ""arrrrrrhh."") Nope, P, it's like arrrrrrhh without a leg."

"If you lose a tooth as an adult, the tooth fairy gives you a trailer."

"Just thinking up snappy comebacks to painful conversations I had 22 years ago. What are YOU doing?"

"Just made this up, probably not as funny as I think it is. What do you call a dozen birds making a rooster? A twelve finch cock!"