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Joke of the Day

"I was gonna post a joke about me being a shitty seller on eBay But my delivery has horrible timing."

"What 2 books do white American boys enjoy reading on their way to school? The Catcher in the Rye and Cooking For Dummies."

"There's so much porn floating around the internet these days... I just shake my fist."

"Boss: ""Sarcasm will get you nowhere in life""!! Me: ""Well It got me to the 'International Sarcasm' finals in Santiago 2011 Boss: ""Really""? Me: ""No"""

"I may seem confident on the outside but deep down on the inside I remember every time I've accidentally leaned on a light switch."

"[Wedding] ""...to join these two in holy matrimony. The Ring, please?"" [Maid of Honor pops tape in VCR.] [One week later: everyone dies.]"

"I watched a gang bang video involving several bus drivers and one woman. She looked bored for half an hour, then suddenly they all came at the same time."

"What is it called when two little people get divorced? Daworfed"

"Today I went to an Indian restaurant and asked for bread They told me they had naan."

"How often do I think about Keira? Knightley."