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Joke of the Day

"Supply drops I was going to tell a joke about supply drops, but you wouldn't get it."

"My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person So I can get a better girlfriend ---Not OC, credit: Anthony Jeselnik"

"I'm hosting a support group for people who struggle to reach orgasm. If you can't come let me know"

"A baby seal walks into a club... That's it. A baby seal walks into a club. o_o"

"Give a fish a man, that's a bit odd. Teach a fish to catch men and... what have you done you fool! Run! We must escape its scaley clutches!"

"Employer: ""In this job we need someone who is responsible."" Applicant: ""I'm the one you want. On my last job, every time anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."""

"Hope having cream on my hands and not being able to turn a doorknob is as close to being in jail as I get."

"Who died and made you king? Oh the king before you died. Well that makes sen- Oh he was your father. Well then I'm very sorry for your loss."

"Roses Are Red... Roses are red, Voilets are violet, This misconseption Makes me violent"

"In case of a zombie apocalypse, I'm surrounding my house with treadmills."