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Joke of the Day

"I paid $200,000 for an English degree and my coworker just asked me to proofread her Facebook status."

"What do you get when you convince a gorilla to have sex with a pig? Fired from the zoo, apparently."

"What does the son of God do when he is the victim of medical malpractice? Jesus"

"Me and my girlfriend always wanted a baby. We tried really hard, but nothing worked. We finally got one when we expected it the least! BAM, over the whole windshield."

"A governor is being inaugurated and there are snipers on buildings and based on my work in video games I'm offended I wasn't asked to help."

"A man rushes into a bar and yells out, ""Guys I just heard the funniest pole joke!"" And the bartender says, ""Hold up there buddy, Im a pole"" And the man replies, ""Okay, then I will tell it slowly"""

"I once went on a date with a playwright It was all going well, until she started making a scene"

"What do you get if you cross a skunk and a dinosaur? A stinkasaurus!"

"Politicians hate each other more than they love America."

"Has anything happened since 2008? I've been looking down at my phone."