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Joke of the Day

"Do let me know if you're ever unhappy with any of my Tweets. I will block you immediately. Anything to stop you being sad. You're welcome :)"

"There are two types of people, those who can extrapolate from incomplete data"

"What's the difference between a $200 vacuum and a $50 vacuum? I don't know, they both suck."

"Did you hear about the golfer that bedded the Queen? He got a hole in one."

"I told a joke to a bunch of guys. They laughed. Now I'm going to prison. For manslaughter."

"I hate niggers"

"What do you call it when you see a smart blonde A dream"

"Wifi went down during family dinner tonight. One kid started talking and I didn't know who he was."

"How did Harry Potter cross the road? Walking Jk rolling"

"Boss: It's almost quitting time. Drinks? Me: In my top desk drawer. Help yourself. Boss:..."