5620

Joke of the Day

"The photo technician got caught masterbating to people's photos They charged him with ""indecent exposure"""

"I'm trying to write a joke with the word ""cunt"" But I cunt."

"What is the ideal weight of a lawyer? About three pounds, including the urn."

"Forget everything you learned in college... ...You won't need it working here.' 'But I never went to college.' 'Well then, I'm sorry. You are under qualified to work here.'"""

"*rings doorbell* hmm... not sure if it rang *waits 2 hours before ringing again so I don't seem impatient*"

"*sneaks into sons room to scare him* *trips over skateboard* *steps on something squishy* *turns light on* *makes him clean his room*"

"I scream. You scream. We all scream. ISIS laughs."

"The main difference between kids and dogs is that kids grow out of following you to the bathroom"

"Somewhere in an alternative universe a girl is kissing a frog hoping it turns back into her charming prince but instead it only turns into the artist formerly known as prince"

"Tomorrow is the start of International Holocaust Deniers Month Maybe better suited for /r/ImGoingToHellForThis?"