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Joke of the Day

"Some people won't try bacon for religious reasons. I won't try religion for bacon reasons."

"What does a 9 volt battery have in common with a girl's butt hole? You know you shouldn't, but sooner or later you're gonna give it a lick."

"My girl has been eating a lot of Mexican fast food and gaining tons of weight lately, but I'll never stop loving her She's my Taco Belle"

"The Superbowl made me feel like I was camping. It was intense."

"Star Wars should cast an Indian actor to play Mace Hindu."

"""I don't think you're ready for this jelly."" ~ me talking shit to my peanut butter sandwich."

"What sort file do you you need to turn a 1.5 inch hole into a 4.5 inch one? A pedo-file."

"Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: There have been sightings of UFOs."

"Would it be dangerous for a human to live 65 million years ago? You bet jurassic would."

"My friend recently visited London. He said everyone was very polite, except in Greenwich. Whenever he asked someone for the time they got all mean about it."