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Joke of the Day

"Star Wars should cast an Indian actor to play Mace Hindu."

"I take my women the same way i take my presidents. Half black and no Bush."

"Q: What do they use frozen band-aids for? A: Cold cuts."

"DIET TIP: Always eat smart. Refuse any food that hasn't scored highly on the SATs and been admitted to an Ivy League school."

"What's the difference between ignorance and indifference? I don't know and I don't care!"

"I lost my mood ring last night... I'm not sure how I feel about that"

"How would Arnold Schwarzenegger describe a sousaphone? ""It's not a tuba!"""

"Did you hear about the Mexican train conductor who killed everyone? He had locomotives."

"What lands as often on its tail as it does its head? A penny."

"Friend: what time do you usually go to bed? Me: 10:30ish sometimes 4"