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Joke of the Day

"For a cat named Jingles, his tambourine accompaniment to my blistering bongo solo isn't that impressive."

"My grandpappy didn't come here from Norway so a black president could let immigrants park their low-riders in front of my liquor store!"

"How do you get a stranger to hop onto a bandwagon? You poke 'em on."

"- Doctor, kiss me! - I can't. We, the doctors, follow a very strict work ethic that does not allow us to kiss our patients. Honestly speaking, I should have never even fucked you in the first place!"

"What do you call 2 accountants having a threesome with a girl? Double-entry"

"My three year old son, Basil, says that since none of us invented language we should stop appropriating words."

"What's the difference between a kinder surprise and Michael jackson. One is a choking hazard for children and the other is a chocolate covered candy"

"I tried changing my password to ""Goku"" But facebook said it was too weak."

"What if Steven Hawking... What if Steven Hawking is the real Slim shady, but we don't know because he cant stand up."

"Q: Why are bison such good musicians? A: They have fantastic horns."