54388

Joke of the Day

"Q: How many snowboarders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: 50: 3 to die trying, 1 to actually pull it off, and 46 other to say, ""man, I could do that!"""

"An iPhone user walks into... [x-post r/funny] a bar, a hotel, a field. He's not too sure"

"A couple of Irishmen are walking down a country road . . . They see a sign that says ""Tree Fellers wanted"". One of them turns to the other and says, ""Dammit. Too bad there's only two of us."""

"What does Snoop Dogg eat? Beets by Dre."

"Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming"

"*takes a hit off the joint *slowly exhales Ahhhhhh This is the best baked sale ever ""It's a BAKE sale"" *exhales again Tell me about it"

"borrow money from a pessimist Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back."

"Two bacteria walk into a bar. The bartender says, ""We don't serve bacteria here."" And the bacteria says, *""But we work here. We're staph.""*"

"If we repeal the 14th amendment, does that means there's room for another 2nd amendment? Same as the old one, but this time in all caps."

"Dad tell me a joke[nsfw] ""Hey dad tell me a joke"" Dad:""Pussy"" Son:""I don't get it"" Dad:""I know hahahaha"""