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Joke of the Day

"What kind of undergarments do mermaids wear? An algebra"

"What did the Doe say when she came out of the woods? I'm not doing that again for two bucks."

"Where does an angry pirate get sent? Anchor Management"

"Teacher: What time do you get up in the morning ? About an hour and a half after I arrived at school"

"I was at Ihop the other day... and there was a one-legged girl named Eileen working there."

"Why didn't the magician shave? He made it disabeard.."

"I listen to gangsta rap sprinkled with a little Sarah McLachlan. Will I murder you? Will I adopt a puppy with you? You don't know."

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend, unless it's one of those half-wits who always says ""ironic"" when they mean coincidental."

"The technology behind whiteboards is remarkable."

"A game I bought my Pokemon-Go playing friend caused her to have a brief panic attack. In hindsight, the latest Counter-Strike probably wasn't a good idea..."