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Joke of the Day

"Two nuns... There are two nuns in a bath. One says, ""where's the soap?"" The other says, ""it does rather, doesn't it!"""

"How did Darth Vader know what Obi-Wan Kenobi was getting for Christmas? He felt his presents."

"You know you were a fat baby.., When the doctor had to get the jaws of life to remove you from your mother."

"Cop: did you do it? Me: no Cop: you know it's truthful Tuesday right? Me: it's actually Wednesday Cop: damn it, who's your crush then"

"Ladies, if a man doesn't answer your ""What are you doing tonight?"" text till it's already night time, you're Plan B."

"There's a black guy in my family tree. He's still hanging there."

"Why do Eskimos have wide noses? Because they pick their nose with their gloves on."

"What do you call a woman who has a lot of sex? Her name."

"What's the benefit of having sex with 24 year olds? There's 20 of them."

"You know how moray eels can't let go when they bite, and both sets of jaws must be pried off even after they're dead? Don't touch my fries."