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Joke of the Day

"Standing in the Park wondering why... I was standing in the Park wondering why Frisbies appear larger the closer it gets. Then it hit me."

"If you beep your horn .004 seconds after the light changes green, I will shut off the car, lay on the hood and feed the birds for an hour."

"I went to the doctor's office for an Alzheimer's test... I can't remember the results."

"How Many Tickles Does it Take to Make a Octopus Laugh? ten-tickles"

"imagine treating the ask a swede hotline like a sex hotline... ""so, what are you wearing?"" ""sensible athletic wear, yah!"" ""ughhhhhhhh."""

"Facebook is cheaper than therapy, twice as effective & you can do it naked."

"My co-worker walks by holding asprin in his hand... He says, they say the weakest link in the chain goes first, I guess that's my head."

"Why do Apes like tall buildings? They want to climb the heights of the business world!"

"I was helping Mom with the computer and now she thinks I'm racist... All I told her to do was push ""ALT + """

"I don't understand why it's called a Chastity Belt. Everyone I know named Chastity is a stripper."