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Joke of the Day

"Dad, I don't wanna sleep with my little brother anymore! - I know, son, but I already told you that we don't have enough money to bury him."

"I tried to buy a Christmas tree to put in my shed. I couldn't find one anywhere. They were all non - shed."

"Why did the condom fly out of the window? Because it was pissed off."

"One sperm said to the other sperm ""I'll race you to the egg!"" The other sperm said ""OK, but pace yourself, we just passed the throat!"""

"Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING!"

"Smoking is actually a good thing for me Look how often I have to go outside into the fresh air"

"What was the first thing that went through the minds of the 9/11 victims? Their knees! Please comment ""No"""

"LF : Clean-ish jokes Need new jokes that aren't dark so I don't scare away the girl I like. Engineering and soccer ones are pluses. Thanks for the help."

"Bill Clinton: ""I sure hope Hillary gets better interns than I did..."" ""All of mine sucked"""

"There are gravy trains and boats. I wonder what gravy did to get on a no-fly list."