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Joke of the Day

"What fruit had to have an announced wedding at home? Cantaloupe"

"You would think that if you pulled a snail's shell off, then it would be able to move faster. I tried it, but they seem to be more sluggish."

"My wife told me to give her 9 inches and make it hurt. I stuck it in her 3 times and punched her arm."

"I told my friend a joke about last night's Game of Thrones episode.. He agreed it was well done."

"truth Give a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Light a man on fire, and he's warm for the rest of his life"

"Dating a single mother: It's like continuing from somebody else's saved game."

"I accidentally fell off a 50-foot ladder but good thing I was only on the 3rd step"

"Roofing... That's a bit over the top isn't it?"

"Bending over in a short skirt will probably get me further than my expensive education ever will."

"Hillary Clinton very well just might be the first F president. I left out the emale because someone deleted them."