52915

Joke of the Day

"Why was the bicycle laying on the ground? Because it was two-tired"

"I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, ""How flexible are you?"" I said, ""I can't make Tuesdays."""

"It takes more muscles to frown than to smile. So, hate fun or have a fat face, your choice."

"what happened when the frog double parked? Its car got toad away."

"What about breakfast teaches us the difference between ""interested"" and ""committed""? In a ham and egg sandwich, the chicken had an interest, but the pig is committed."

"*wife phones* ""Hi!"" ""Hi! Did you clean the house?"" ""Uhh...YUP!"" ""OK, I'm coming home. Need anything?"" ""Yes, about 2 hours."""

"Two young hot girls in bed. k"

"I heard if you went on a diet.. you could end world hunger."

"I hate my job. The work sucks. The people suck. The pay sucks. *looks up and sees motivational poster on wall* Well this changes everything"

"What does spinach and anal sex have in common? If you were forced to have either as a child you are unlikely to enjoy it as an adult."