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Joke of the Day

"I was once in a play called Breakfast In Bed. Did you have a big role? No just toast and marmalade."

"You're about as useless as an asshole with tastebuds."

"I just burned 12000 calories I left the pizza in the oven"

"I scream. You scream. We all scream. This fancy wine bars toilet gender signs were unclear."

"Why was the Dark Age dark? Because there were too many knights...."

"Said I'd buy my son some stuffing for his pillow. He wanted to come with me. Then his sister did too So now I'm getting down with the kids."

"Did you hear about the magic tractor? It drove down the road and turned into a field"

"Which spice is the worst at keeping secrets? Only thyme will tell."

"Shortest Horror Story: Tomorrow is MONDAY again!"

"I am a proud member of the CBC Short for 'Canadians Against Dyslexia'"