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Joke of the Day

"Waxing. It's not a cure for lycanthropy."

"Are you ready for TheDivision's upcoming DLC? TheAddition? If not, you might like its already-existing-but-cut-for-later content TheSubstraction."

"What type of curry sets fire to the rain? A-Dhal"

"Two elephants meet a nudist After a while one elephant says to the other ""I really don't get how he can feed himself with that thing"""

"When a man falls off a boat, you say, ""Man overboard!"" What do you say when a woman falls off a boat? ""Full speed ahead!"""

"I measured my penis today and it said 11.7 inches. Then I realized the ruler was backwards. Credit to /u/TodoJaw21"

"""Hey girl wanna go out Saturday night?"" No thanks I have a previous engagement ""I'm cool with that, hell I've been married like 6 times"""

"What does your momma and a hockey player have in common? They both change their pads after three periods."

"Why is it impossible to mistake a penis for a vagina? Because there's a vas deference."

"What does a Mexican have in common with a cue ball? The harder you hit em' the more English you get outta em'!"