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Joke of the Day
"Q: What kind of flower grows on your face? A: Tulips."
Next Joke
"What do nails like to do on the weekend? Get hammered."
"[grocery store] dad to his crying baby: shhh stop crying [baby keeps crying] me: wow, your baby does not listen"
"I bet when slutty girls get cremated instead of ashes the family just gets an urn full of glitter."
"What did Victoria say to Vancouver? I'll BC-ing you later."
"19 and 20 got in a fight. 21."
"Here's a good joke... SWAG"
"Where do you find a no-legged dog? Right where you left him."
"INTERVIEWER: it says here on your resume that you're good at small talk? ME: yes INTERVIEWER: holy shit"
"RIP Jordin Sparks She had no air"