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Joke of the Day
"What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend? Wiped his butt"
Next Joke
"One day I got this huge erection. I started running and hit a wall. You know what broke? My nose"
"I wish Twitter would add bold or italics or meaning to my life."
"My 5 year old hasn't said a word in the car after I convinced him that the volume control on our stereo ejects his car seat."
"I'll bet you, like me, average the most ""uh""s per sentence when ordering at a fast food drive thru."
"I learned most of what I know about dropping pianos on people from cartoons."
"What was the last phone call made from the Twin Towers? An order for two large plains."
"A true Columbus Day sale in a mattress store would mean all the merchandise is infested with smallpox"
"""No Kanye, it's called Coney Island."" ""Kanye Island."" ""Coney Island"" ""Kanye Island."" ""Co... ney."" ""Kan... ye."""
"Hey people who say ""look at our new baby"", thanks for clarifying that because my initial reaction was to ask where you got the used baby"