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Joke of the Day
"Why did the USSR agree to a nonaggression pact with Nazi Germany? They were Stalin."
Next Joke
"Two antennas met on a roof. They fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent."
"I'm leaving for London tomorrow. It's going to be really weird Tweeting from the left hand side of the road."
"What colour did Matthew McConaughey paint his house? All white, all white, all white..."
"The worst thing about being a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac ...is that you stay up all night contemplating the existence of dog."
"What was Whitney Houston's favourite kind of co-ordination? Haaaaannnnndd eeeyyyyyyeeeeee"
"Why do seagulls fly over the sea? If they flew over the bay they would be baygulls. My dad told me this like 10 years ago and I can't get it out of my head..."
"What's the difference between cats and dogs? Dogs have owners, cats have staff."
"A wizard who likes to give zombies hickies is.. a neckromancer."
"What do you say when you cross a donkey and a deer? Dat ass doe"