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Joke of the Day
"What time does Sean Connery get to the US Open? Ten-ish"
Next Joke
"My boss has a rather shrill phone voice. I once spent 20m talking to him, before realizing it was actually someone trying to send us a fax."
"Two random variables were talking in a bar They thought they were being discrete but I heard them continuously."
"Kourtney Kardashian named her daughter 'Penelope Scotland Disick'. In a related story, Scotland intends to change name of country ASAP."
"Canada got rid of the penny. It makes no cents."
"What does a bartender give you when you need the feeling of a strong drink, but you're not allowed ton consume alcohol? Xanax since he's a Bartender"
"What do you get when you squish a synagogue? Jews"
"What has seven arms and sucks? Def Leppard."
"How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2...and don't ask me how they got in there. (My 87 year old grandma just told me this one)"
"If two wrongs don't make a right, what do two rights make? The first airplane."