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Joke of the Day

"Looking back on Britain's 2016. The year most middle aged men went from wanting to fuck Nigella to wanting to fuck Nigel up."

"Due to controversies over child labor in China, Apple has recently had to lay off thousands of people due to loss in sales... They fired the kindergarteners and half the first grade."

"political joke Republicans are Red Democrats are Blue and neither one gives a fuck about you"

"I put a sock on my doorknob To let people know I'm getting busy with another sock."

"I hide my condoms in a box of Nyquil... ...if I use either, I'll blow a load and be asleep in 10 minutes."

"What did the Zen master say to the hot dog vendor? ""Make me one with everything."""

"I love the way the Earth rotates. It really makes my day."

"bowie leaves us and then a 9th planet appears, i don't need to read your science article"

"Hey, what's the difference between reddit and LOTR? In the books and movies, the trolls didn't type."

"What do you call a fat rat? enormouse"