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Joke of the Day

"I have an oven with a 'stop time' button. It's probably meant to be 'stop timer' but I don't touch it, just in case."

Next Joke
 
"I miss Steve Irwin But the stingray didnt."
"They gave me some cake but it was way too basic and burned my mouth. Turns out the cake was a lye. ^^^^^^sorry"
"What's a pedophile's favorite shoe? White vans"
"Why was the tree soooo happy? Because he didn't arbor any feelings!"
"I'll never know if those cookies will give me super powers or not unless I eat some."
"I hate finding out I'm arguing with someone who actually knows what they're talking about."
"Michael Jackson is the epitome of the American Dream Only in America could a poor, black boy become a rich, white woman"
"By the power vested in me by my credit card, I now pronounce you my new fluffy hat. You may now hug my head."
"I showed my family facebook a few years ago, and haven't heard from them since. Best decision ever"