49599

Joke of the Day

"""pew, pew, pew!"" -me, pointing out seating options in a church"

"What did the snake day to Adam after he bit the apple? You owe Eve an O."

"How to make her squirt: make sure she is a lime"

"Girl, do you have a defibrillator? Cause my heart stops everytime I see you"

"My coworkers think it's funny they have power & I don't. I think it's funny how they won't get home to enjoy it cuz their tires are slashed."

"(NSFW) Why does Beyonce sing ""To the left, to the left""? Because niggers have no rights. or Option 2: Because women have no rights."

"What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last big hit was The Wall..."

"""Hey left ball!""...""What, right ball?"" Who's the penis in betweenus?"

"music joke As the Cellist in our string quartet, i can't help but feel the other musicians are looking down on me. sorry about that, i will just be getting my coat."

"I want a SPIDERMAN GO app where I have to get pictures of spiderman for a furious j jonah jameson"