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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Seahawks pass the ball? To get to the other side!"

"Joke Yo momma so fat when she goes to the grocery store she brings a battery charger."

"I'm getting mighty fed up with these sheep-human hybrids! What is with ewe people!?"

"How did Han Solo enter the world? On the perineum falcon!"

"[at a spelling bee] Judge: Your word is SPELL. Witch: *mumbles something under her breath* Judge: Ribbit"

"What if you woke up with amnesia and all you could remember was your Facebook password and you had to discover who you were based on your statuses?"

"At willcall for a concert, I start a conversation with the lady in front of me. It was the first time I had used a pick up line to talk to a woman."

"Q: What's gray and comes in pints? A: An elephant."

"""Always bring a nail file, scissors, tweezers, a corkscrew, a toothpick and a bottle opener to a knife fight"" - The Swiss Army"

"Based on the Scotland vote results... It looks like the UK didn't get off Scot-free."