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Joke of the Day
"What's black, grey, and red all over? A gorilla with a child in the enclosure."
Next Joke
"ME: I'm worthless. DAD: Remember, son: you owe eighty thousand dollars in student loans. You're less than worthless."
"What happened to the girl who wore a mouse costume to her Halloween party? The cat ate her."
"My performance as ""guy who acts disgusted when wife says our recently divorced neighbor is dating a 23 year old"" is getting early Emmy buzz."
"CAT: Can u check my blood pressure? DR DOG: *places cuff around cat's neck* Sure CAT: Shouldnt that go on m- DR DOG: *inflating cuff* Ssshhh"
"If you look in your bathroom mirror & say ""Donald Trump"" 3 times, the hair in your shower drain rises up & starts yelling racist slurs."
"I don't drink Kool-Aid because I am worried about excessive property damage."
"Cinco de Mayo means five of mayonnaise in Spanish."
"It was so cold last night I saw a lawyer with his hands in his *own* pockets."
"I went jogging one time why am I not thin?"