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Joke of the Day
"I got a new thesaurus. It's terrible. On top of that, it's also terrible."
Next Joke
"C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar. The bartender shows them the door and says, ""Sorry, we don't serve minors."""
"6 year old: Daddy, what if the plane goes down? Me: Don't worry, your mom is with us. She never goes down. 6 year old: What? Me: Want candy?"
"Whenever you floss, you should be allowed to go to your dentist's house and collect an allowance."
"""Hey, enough with the damn songs! We're all studying for finals."" -rest of the school on Glee"
"I was having sex with this girl, and she said some other guy's name. I was pissed. Who the fuck is Rape?"
"What'd the farmer say when he lost his tractor? ""Where's my tractor?"""
"Back in my day, we didn't have computers or the internet. Guys would have to walk uphill for days to tell me I'm gay."
"My friend told me Alan Rickman had passed away. I said ""You're joking?"".... ...She replied ""Nope. Dead Sirius."""
"Why did the scale decide that the scam artists were heavier than the novels? Because the cons outweighed the prose."