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Joke of the Day

"I told a man I was voting third party He said, ""That's wasting your vote! Come on, gun to your head, who would you pick, Clinton or Trump"" ""Simple,"" I replied, ""I'd pick the bullet."""

Next Joke
 
"The voices in my head have been quiet for a while. They probably broke something."
"/r/Jokes won't get this an actual funny joke"
"What do you call the sexual tension between Hillary and Bill Clinton? The Bern"
"Like Bjork always says, ""When life gives you lemons, giggle in childish wonder as they confide in you their citrusy secrets."""
"I know why you wear your wedding ring on your left hand guys. Cause once you say ""I do"" your right hand is gonna be awful busy."
"If I had a dollar for every time a homeless person asked me for money... I'd still say no."
"Some idiot asked me what the 27th letter of the Arabic alphabet is... And all I could say was, ""Wow""."
"[walks into Halloween party with a hot dog taped to my head] ""What are you supposed to be?"" ME: I'm not wearing a costume"
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Baby ! Baby who ? Baby love my baby love.... !"