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Joke of the Day
"Masturbation Sometimes I masturbate into my big pussy cat and jerk off into my computer"
Next Joke
"Why is Congress like a cold? Because sometimes the ayes (eyes) have it and sometimes the no's (nose)."
"Girl are you a dinosaur? Cuz jurassic."
"How did jew get beer? He brew"
"I've been squeezing the last drop of toothpaste from this tube for over a month now."
"When choosing a bottle of wine, it's good to pick one with a picture of the animal you'd most like to get drunk with on the label."
"What do you call a Pokemon with a tiny head? Zikachu"
"What does a perverted cow do at night? Beef Jerkey"
"*buys shed at B&Q* B&Q: Are you putting this up yourself? Me: No, it's going in the garden. B&Q: Me: B&Q: I can't help you anymore."
"Went on a date once. He ordered for me, ""She'll have a small side salad."" I said, ""Yes, and a side of sirloin and a loaded baked potato."""