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Joke of the Day
"Teach us About Absolute Zero! 0K!"
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"The Never Ending Story should've been a movie about a phone call from my Mother"
"What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn ? An eggroll !"
"Despite it being close to Christmas, I'm still on my Summer diet... ...I'll have summer that, summer that, and summer that."
"I'm not good at many things. But incest is where I come into my own."
"What do you call a Soviet ruler dancing on a cracker? Putin on the Ritz. *ba-dum tsh*"
"Broke bakers need dough."
"I don't think that we should let kids listen to symphonies. There's too much Sax and Violins nowadays."
"Hey! Wanna hear my Ebola joke? Nah, nevermind. You won't get it."
"*at the confessional Priest: .'..and do you repent? Do you plan to repeat these sins?' Me: 'You mean, like, ever?'"